Madhatter Pipe Dreams
I've been havin' crazy pipe dreams, don't laugh
And please don't tell the mental hospital staff
But I wake up in a land filled with mushrooms
Overrun with plants of doom and fire flowers in bloom
It don't stop there; this sound insane
But there's a princess in peril that calls out my name
"Mario!" I dunno how she knows me though
But she's fine as hell and has an ass like "Whoa!"
So I run through the land, and I'm quick on the double
Dreamin' no dream, man, Toadstool is in trouble
So bring on King Koopa, I ain't that impressed
I'mma flush out that punk like a plumber possessed
I am true to my claim
Fat boy plumber, Mario is the name
Collectin' coins, I'm all about the cash
And you know them chicks dig the bushy-ass mustache
I grab my brown boots and bright red cap
And my blue overalls, old-school like dat!
My hands are shakin' with a fireball itch
I'm about to make Bowser my bitch!
I've been havin' crazy pipe dreams
My brother's in them too
Luigi, but Luigi's a wussy
So it's up to me to save the Mushroom Kingdom
I'm here to kick ass and chew bubblegum
But I'm all outta gum, man, I know that was lame
But when your enemies are turtles, you can't have no
shame
You've got koopa troopas
And even parakoopa troopas
Stomp on their shells and leave them in a stupa*
Supa Dupa MARIO! Magic fungus!
Make me grow double size, stomp my foes to dust
I'm quick to put a boot to a Goomba's forehead!
One small jump and I'm leavin' them dead!
* (stupor, but pronounced stupa)