Beer & Sex & Chips 'n' Gravy Lyrics

Cleaned my teeth, put on my best clobber,
Tonight's the night I'm going to knob her
Vauxhall Viva's covered in rust,
But you can't shag a bird on a 29 bus
Beer and sex and chips and gravy, its all a Macc Lad
wants
Beer and sex and chips and gravy, and a tasty bit of
clump
Get up off the floor, finish your chips, we're going to
sup some more

Pulled the bird down the Fox & Grapes
Game of darts and a lot of beer
'Can you hold your liquor (licker) love?'
'Yes I can, always by the ears.'

Treat your women like toilets
They're happy when you're abusing them
But toilets don't follow you round when you've finished
using them