Jake Thackray Family Tree
Up my, my family tree
There hangs my curious pedigree,
My long, my lurid ancestry -
The prancing phantoms and ghosts
Of my rude forefathers.
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they all perch to see
Up my, up my family tree.
Up my, my family tree,
No blue blood, no nobility;
No trace of aristocracy -
Except for Uncle Sebastian
Who once raped a duchess.
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they perch for all to see
Up my, up my family tree.
We've no ancestral halls,
No haughty portraits on our walls;
No family monuments at all -
Unless it's my cousin Sheila's
Stupendous cleavage.
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they perch for all to see
Up my, up my family tree.
My great-great-uncle Sam,
A very tranquil sort of man,
Could not afford his wife a pram -
He pushed his babies round the park
In a green wheelbarrow.
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they perch for all to see
Up my, up my family tree.
My Uncle Will, my Auntie May
Were very much in love, so they
Got married after some delay -
They dressed their kids up in white
When they both went legal.
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they perch for all to see
Up my, up my family tree.
When brother Richard was thirteen
He was a Boy Scout, keen and clean.
He got presented to the Queen -
And then he went and spoiled it all
When he offered her a Woodbine.
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they perch for all to see
Up my, up my family tree.
Let this be understood,
That our family name is mud,
Our sheep are black our cheques are dud -
But we survive! We're alive!
So it's up with the Thackrays!
Nevertheless, despite their sins,
Bless my kiths and bless my kins.
There they perch for all to see
Up my, up my, up my, my family tree.
