Sadistik Absolution
I write in long hand a short-term memory/
Hopeless romantic, coarse word tendencies/
RIght now I don't want to wake up/
Or try to forget when the storm first entered me/
Lately I've felt self destructive/
Self-inflicted, self help the cuts with/
Shellshocked, Hell's bells and trumpets/
Self-taught to tell tales in public/
Of this life, same shit but different day/
I write it down, same shit in different ways/
Fight it now, break fists against the cage/
Until I climb on that slave ship and drift away/
My blood boils (in cups) the sun spoils (abrupt)/
And unloyal (with love) so come toil (with us)/
The sun freezes (and cuts) in some seasons (and plus)/
Its untreated (so trust) I'm done bleeding/
In a place where I can be and touch all of the things I
see/
To find my peace and I can breathe with nobody looking
back at me/
I'll just take a breath and place my bets but never
deal/
'Til I face my death with a game of chess like Seventh
Seal/
I'll still fight the stepdads and memories/
Scream Zion 'til deaf dance to melodies/
Deadpanned with setbacks and jealousy/
Until hea-ven ex-pands the hell in me/
Acquired conscious competence of all of my
accomplishments/
And conquered constant comments that contradicted my
confidence/
Common compliments were called upon to con me in/
Accosted consonant comments that condescended all my
common sense/
Where I'm from, no one stays alive/
You just die by the sword, a shogun's frame of mind/
Walk with the rest like its Dawn of the Dead/
And drink from the blood that the open veins provide/
My raps are like a novel with clever style and prose/
Im Edgar Allan Poe, the Casque of Amontillado/
Enter catacombs 'til clever palindromes/
And letters that I wrote can capture the god Apollo/
Hear the secret stammers time'll tell/
I rebel, they teach me manners with Bible-belt/
Schtick, psychadellic, dreams of banter/
Scenes of candor I embellish/
Like a zombie that eats through tissue/
Until I find a heart with a beat to spit to/
If its not in the meat I sift through/
I'll write it acapella on the piece I bit through/
I'm savage, and its near the dead of night/
Wait 'til the sun paints an iridescent sky/
To head the deadened cries/
Of an old boy given no choice but to fear the present
time/
Take the reigns, I'm sick and tired of the practice/
of burnin' bridges, I lit the fire with a matchstick/
Return the image to where I'm at, cuz thinking back/
I've been sinking fast, and tripping wires where the
sands quick/
Across plains with bloody palms and jaw pains/
Hiding from God's grace in fright like its Pompeii/
And always, I'll just stay on the lost road/
While you study crucifixes painted with barcodes/
At first its just a ride to live fast/
Until I felt the bruises inside from whiplash/
A purpose, I'll try to get that/
Until I fall from grace and I die on impact/
And intact was a single broken locket/
With the ocean on its rustic chain and face that no one
wanted/
I'm growing nauseous from a world that never stops/
When my center's lost hope in the ghost that haunted
Pentecost/
I stand in graveyards and dance to take charge/
Of concepts of death that I have to base on/
Even when my bones crack I'll pace on/
Through the epitaphs that my pasts engraved on/
Laugh and stay strong, embrace the day/
'Till it fades away with this mask I paint on/
She's probably just a bitch thats casting all the
shadows/
Laughing at my battles and following a trend/
Searching for an angel at the bottom of a fifth/
But my hands stay empty, I swallow it again/
Its the loss of leaves that autumn brings/
That show me these limbs are far from wings/
I'm far from happy, you're far from peace/
I'll fall from grace and you'll fall for me/
And awkwardly I'll just change the posture/
'Till the aches and pains rearrange the monsters/
