Two Margarines Lyrics

John Shuttleworth Two Margarines

Two margarines on the go, it's a nightmare scenario,
Two margarines in my life, two margarines to butter my knife.
Two margarines but which one, should I use to butter my scone?
It's a dilemma, second to none.

Two margarines on the go, it's a nightmare scenario
Two margarines in my life, doesn't seem to bother my wife
She's the one who ignored the first,
And opened the second which began the curse
Of the two margarines; is there anything worse?

Two margarines on the go, it's a nightmare scenario
Two margarines in my fridge, it's enough to end a happy marriage
Two margarines, how I long, for the day when there's only one.
My wife says "You're a lunatic John"
But two margarines ... Oooh, it's like a bad dream!