Flight Of The Conchords Bus Driver's Song
Speaking* "G'day, my name's Tony. On behalf of myself
and the coachline I'd like to thank you for choosing to
drive with us today. I'm a local, I hope I can impart
some local knowledge. If you've got any questions don't
hesitate, just sing out. For those who are interested,
there's the Old Bridge, swaying away. Replaced by the
New Bridge in 1972. Funny thing, the Old Bridge used to
be called the New Bridge. Yeah, bit of a funny thing.
Up ahead there's the bronze of Bluey, a local sheepdog,
who became a member of Regional Council. It was a
bloody great day for dogs, not just here, but
everywhere in the North Island. There's the town's
oldest street. That's the Museum of Meat. There's the
town's largest industry, that's the sock factory, hence
the giant sock."
*Sings* The town hall
Note the mosaic wall
Well, there are 5,600 tiles on that wall
I know, I counted them all
The local school, the local swimming pool,
Which was opened by the Governor General,
Back in 1952
Where I was caught with a friend aged 11, sniffing
tractor fuel
We thought we were pretty cool, breaking them changing
shed rules
But do you see up there?
The banner hanging in the air?
The Presbyterian Fair
Well, I never go, there's too many Presbyterians there
But if you're interested, the fair's in the third
weekend of August every year
But don't bother entering the raffle,
It's always won by some kid of the Mayor
Do you hear that sound?
The town clock, heard from anywhere in town,
Until 1960, it was a little place in Norway
We bought it for a hundred pounds
Rumor has it they sold it cheap because the chimes were
too loud
But every time I hear that sound it makes me so proud
Look to your left, what a beautiful sight,
It's Paula, Paula Thompson, nee Paula Wright.
Look at her hair, it's still gorgeous, even now.
Flowing like the Womahonga River,
Which incidently, is to your right.
And it's the largest, in the area
In terms of volume.
Everybody, look at Paula, look at Paula Thompson
I always thought I'd marry Paula
But some things just don't work out that way
Well, that's the most important thing you'll learn on
the tour today
That, and the fact there'll be a toliet break
At the information center near the manmade lake
*Speaking* "Yeah, I'll just ask you one favor, if you
do see Paula in town later on that you don't mention
the details of the tour. I'd appreciate that. Same goes
for my wife, Gloria. You'll recognize her, she looks a
hell of a lot like Paula, actually. She often gets
mistaken for Paula, but, um, well, she's not Paula,
that's for sure, no."
*Singing*
Paula Thompson, born in '54
To a family of four
To the family next door
Take me back next door
Paula Thompson, nee Paula Wright.
That's her old house, number 39
Number 41 was mine
If this old coach could go back in time
I'd drive to 1979
Take me back...
Take me back, take me back
(Take, take, take, take me back)
Take me back, take me back
(Take, take, take, take me back)
Take me back, take me back, take me back, take me back,
take me back, take me back...
*Speaking* "Yeah, sorry about that. I always get a
little bit emotional on the corner of Rutherford and
Brown Streets. But, um, that is truly the end of the
tour, so mind your step, yeah, good on you."