Chris Orrick Rum & Coke
[Louis C.K. skit]
Thank you very much, thanks, everybody! Hello! Nice to be here, how are you doing? Good?
Nice to be here... I'm broke, anybody else broke?
[Verse 1]
Now if you would have told me this is where I'd be at 25
I would have told you to go f..ck yourself
I can't remember when's the last time that I felt alive
How can you when you don't love yourself
I mean
I sit and waste away in this apartment
In this trendy little city
Where my girlfriend's car gets
Stolen right outside where she parked it
And all I do is get drunk and stare at this carpet like
I should probably vacuum
I'm sick of looking at that coffee table
Covered in those past dues
And writing about that coffee table
Covered in those past dues
And every time that Dad calls, it's always f..cking bad news
Then she texted me on her break
Said she wanted to get away
I said we should go on a date
She asked if i'm sure that I can afford it
I said that it's not important
There's gotta be something more to life
We spend all this time on this planet goddamn it
We barely manage
Let's take a second to vanish
Imagine if we could do it
Couple kids in their 20s
Don't worry about the money
The waitress'll take your order like
[Chorus]
She said "Would it be alright if I got a rum & coke?"
I said "Baby for tonight, let's pretend that we're not broke"
Sick of living in tomorrow, should be living in the here
She whispered something in my ear and said
You only get this once, you better love it
[Verse 2]
Now I implore that you spend
Every single dollar that you have
Never find a happy man
Obsessed with piling up his cash
When the reaper comes to greet you
And he's preying on your soul
You can beg and you can cry
But you can't pay him off in gold
So take a mortgage on my heart
What's a credit score to God?
It's been seven years
And they're still bill collecting on my Mom
They'll come after you long after you've been resting in your grave
Take every dollar that you made
And every dollar that you saved
And spend that shit
Spend it on the weekend
Spend it on your girlfriend
Cause when the world ends
Goes off the deep end
My uncle said a lucky man will die with three friends
It doesn't make you love to have a bank account with three M's
It makes you loved to have some people in your life that love you
The most obvious shit I think I've ever said
It isn't money or a house or a cabin on a lake
It's a family it's a spouse loving every single day
[Chorus]
[Bridge]
It's the sound of the machines, drowning out my dreams
It's everything I hate and it's everything I am
It's the way I pack my lunch, it's the clock I gotta punch
It's everything I hate and it's everything I am
It's my motherfucking job, treating money like my god
It's everything I hate and it's everything I am
It's everything I hate and it's everything I am
[Chorus]