Smosh We Rule High School
Uh, what up freshmen?!
All the freshmen in the house say yeah!
Yes!
I said all the freshmen in the house say yeah!
Yep!
Uh uh, here we go! High school is pretty crap
So we're gonna teach you with this hecka cool rap
How to get through your first year of school
And how to be like us and be super cool!
If you wanna be cool you gotta get to school late.
Cool guys always show up to school late.
The teacher might smack you and player hate
But don't worry bro, you can hit her with a tate-ertot.
Tater tots are great weapons and great food.
Put them in your pocket for lunchtime; dude.
But they get your pocket all hecka greasy.
Cafeteria pizza will make you queasy.
()
Being a freshmen is totally fresh, man.
Ditch class, punch bullies, throw them in a trashcan.
If a teacher tries to fail you, don't get mad.
Just go home and bitch about it to your dad.
There isn't such thing as being bullied.
That's just called "being a bitch".
Step up to the bully, grab his balls,
And give them a great big pinch.
I once pinched a bully's balls so hard
They fell on the ground.
He cried like a big, dumb baby as I kicked them all around.
His doctors tried to sew his balls back on; but they just couldn't do it
Cuz I broke into the operating room, grabbed his sack, and I threw it
Into his mom's mouth.
()
Doing good in class and paying attention is for losers.
I do good grammar and all I do is stare at teachers' hooters.
But I still get A's in every class.
Wanna know how cuz I ch-ch-ch-ch-cheat?
Let us show you now!
You hide in a plant for a couple of hours 'til everyone's gone away,
Then you sneak to the computer; use cool hacks and change all your grades.
Just watch out for the big janitor that comes at night.
Try blinding him with you big flashlight,
Then beat him to death with a big chalk stick and kick him repeatedly in his big long...
High school is not a place for f-f-f-f-fun.
It's a place for making out with chicks and scoring digits son.
Never do homework and always ditch!
And that's how you survive high school bitch!
(explosion)
When you're in your locker room,
Make sure you wear a really long shirt
Or else you'll get a boner and everyone will...
(the last three lines are just extras to the song)