Paul Roland Aunty
Aunty lacks the social graces
She pulls the most peculiar faces
In the most public of places
She really is a scream
Her voice is lound, her manners too
Her dresses green and her jokes quite blue
But you should see her dance the Hoochie Coo
The Lindy or the Frog
Everyone says Aunty's thrifty
But they don't know her hidden gifts she
Seldom pays but goes "shoplifty"
She's mastered slight of hand
She favours all the better stores
Shoplifting from floor to floor
And always one step from the law
Her friends are bores or frightful smarties
They're really not the type for Aunty
Still, she gives the most outrageous parties
And everybody comes
A nuisance everywhere she goes
An embarrassment to those she knows
But I know where her money goes
She's left it all to me