Paraquat Goodbye Fairground
she said sharing a warm bed with a stranger
is better than sleeping alone.
because at least you’ve got a warm bed and someone who’s with you
and that’s better than being on your own.
well i’ve never been that stranger
and i’ll never understand
what she meant when she said it’s ok
to be the one who is gone
long before the sun rises
as long as the sleeping one pays.
i told her you don’t need to go,
you can stay for a while,
use my couch and i’ll sleep on the floor.
when you decide it’s time to move on
i’ll wish you the best
and give you the keys to my door.
and then she smiled at me
and i tried to smile back the same way
but i failed. i’m sure no one here smiles like she does.
and when she looked at me with angry eyes and said
why don’t you get up on your feet?
i told her
because i never fell down.
she said
all i ever wanted was a husband who cares
and maybe a flat i call mine
but all i ever got was this bed i have to share
and an asshole who calls me sometimes.
i consider you my friend
but friendship doesn’t seem to mean much nowadays.
still i want you to know that i’ll be there for you
and together we will find a way.
she said i’m confused like a rapist on a honeymoon.
with the young girl in his trunk and his wife in the hotel room.
how often can you say ‘yes’ until nobody listens to ‘no’ anymore?
i‘m so f..cking sick and i wanna go home.
