Hovey Benjamin Past My Prime
[Intro]
Oh my God
I just realized something terrible
[Chorus]
I'm past my athletic prime
I wasted my whole athletic prime
It's gone like the sands of time (Gone)
All that's left for me to do is die
Will I ever go pro?
No, sorry bro
Will I make it to the NBA?
No way, not today, forever
[Verse 1]
Why did I waste my time?
Makin' these beats and these rhymes
I should've trained for the draft
Instead of makin' 'em laugh
Why am I trying to sing?
I should be chasin' a ring
I'm past my prime
All I got left is my, sexual prime
Let me just double-check that online
Wait, according to Cosmo Magazine
I sexually peaked at 18
[Chorus]
I'm past my sexual prime
I could've been the Ron Jeremy of my time
I'm sad 'cause I never tried
Now I prolly have to turn to a life of crime
Will I star in a porno?
Of course no, it's too late
Will I have a threesome with two milfs?
I don't think I will, I lack the skills
[Verse 2]
I wish I tried my best
I should've focused on sex
Now I just smash for free
Instead of professionally
Watching a porn movie
Thinkin' that could've been me
I'm past my prime
All I got left is my, Optimus Prime
Let me just double-check that online
Oh my God, Transformers aren't real
I don't even know how to feel
[Bridge]
I'm past my Optimus Prime
I will never bring a cool red truck to life
I wish I had a sentient ride
I always thought I'd fight with robots in the sky
Will I hang out with an autobot?
Probably not, they don't exist
Will I ever meet Shia LaBeouf?
Well, actually, I don't know, maybe
[Outro]
I'm past my prime
I wasted my life
But don't you cry
'Cause when I die
I still have my, Amazon Prime
I'm just now entering my Amazon Prime as I leave my athletic prime