Christine Lavin On My Way To Hooterville, Pt. 3
On my way to a festival up in Canada
A volunteer met my plane, a foggy day
She's there to drive me to a house in town
Where I'm assigned to stay
I am sleep deprived and cranky
All I want is to lie down
In the car she casually says
"I don't make left hand turns"
As we drive into town
She explains she just got her license
Turning left makes her too scared
So we'll have to take a right, do a U-turn
She laughed don't worry I'll get you there
We finally arrive at our destination
Wе knock, a young girl opens the door
We ask for hеr parents
She says they're at work
And what are we here for?
I explain I'm the American musician
Who is staying with them for a while
"Come in! You can have my room!"
She says with a shy friendly smile
So we drag my bags down a long hallway
She flings her bedroom door open wide
It's a room cluttered wall to wall to wall with stuff
'I'll clean it up right now!' she cried
This little girl is on her way to being a hoarder
I tell her on second thought I'm gonna go
I noticed a hotel a couple blocks back
But the little girl said, "No no no!"
I tell her sweetheart I am too cranky and tired
Tell your parents thank you for me
The volunteer drives to me back to that hotel
Where I fell asleep immediately
I wake up with my cellphone ringing
The festival office wanted to know what was wrong?
They said the family waited for my arrival
All day long
The woman who can't make left hand turns
Has other problems, I guess
Turns out she brought me to
Yup, the wrong address
What if the parents had come home to find
A cranky American folksinger sleeping in their daughter's bed?
Ah, they're Canadians, they'd probably laugh
Make me dinner instead
Or at least offer me a cup of tea
And when I had my fill
I'd wave goodbye to Canada
'cause I'm on my way to Hooterville
I don't make left hand turns
Come in, you can have my room!
The carpet is soft as a dream
I can't see in the dark
