Adam & Joe Australia
Last night I saw a film
It had Jack Hugeman in
And Nipples Kidman, too
It cost me ten pounds to get in
And a fiver for a coke
It was supposed to be
About the history
Of the antipodes
But it lacked authenticity
It was Baz Luhrmann's Australia-aa
Aa-aa-aa-aa-aa
Baz Luhrmann's Australia-aa
An uptight English wife
Comes to reclaim her farm
But finds her husband dead
And falls in love with Hugh Jackman
When she sees him take his shirt off
An evil rancher played
By that man from Cocktail
Comes to destroy her herd
He wants to make her business fail
It's Baz Luhrmann's Australia-aa
Aa-aa-aa-aa-aa
Baz Luhrmann's Australia-aa
Then there's a little boy
Half-aboriginal
He hides inside water towers
And he's got magical powers
It's slightly racist, I know
But that's the way that it goes
Just when you think the film
Is coming to an end
It simply keeps going on
It's over three hours long
I don't know what happened next
Because I got up and left
Aa, I have better things to do-oo
And my bum was numb by that point
Aa, I will watch the rest on my TV
When it's out on DVD
